Plowing Past Past Pain

Past problems can be a never-ending
source of conflict. Sometimes, couples are so
desperate to forget the past that they pretend
as if nothing ever happened. They try to will
themselves into a state of forgetfulness. But
this doesn’t work; it just leads to more
resentment. Trying to forget is almost
impossible. The real solution is to learn from
the past without dwelling in it. To learn from the
past, you must face it. Pain can be forgiven,
but it cannot be forgotten until it is transformed
into hope. New meanings must be added to
old memories. Pain turns to promise when a
couple decides to review the past so that they
are not condemned to repeat it.